Dear 1950s Wife:
It’s just a few days till “Superbowl Sunday” and normally I’d be really excited.
Being a girly-girl, I of course know absolutely nothing about football. (Why do they call it that anyway? The players’ feet hardly ever touch the ball.)
But I love watching the exciting half-time show, as well as the super-funny commercials. I always have a blast gabbing with my gal pals at the gym the next day about the fabulous singers entertaining at half time and our favorite commercials during the game.
But I’m afraid I got a bit too tickled watching one of last year’s commercials, the ad where the dog’s bark sounds like a fart. I put my hands over my mouth as soon as the commercial ended but I couldn’t help laughing a good five seconds after the game resumed.
Naturally, my husband was upset at his concentration being disturbed. He turned me over his knee and soundly spanked my bottom then put me in the naughty chair facing living room corner for the rest of the game.
And this year he’s not even letting me watch the Superbowl. I’ll spend the two hours prior to the game as usual whipping up a huge platter of fried beef jerky and tray of liverwurst and onion sandwiches with extra mayo so Hubby won’t go hungry during the game. But he’s making me sit in the naughty chair facing the corner as soon as the Superbowl begins.
I wouldn’t really mind as long as I could hear the commercials and the half-time show, as that would at least let me join in the hen talk next day with my gal pals at the gym about our favorite singers and ads.
But Hubby is going to watch “women’s lingerie football” on another channel during half time. And he says the Superbowl commercials’ “blither blather” disturbs his concentration charting game statistics, so he’s going to hit the mute button when the ads play.
The good news is, as I’m being put in the naughty chair for being irritating as opposed to being bad, my husband’s letting me read a book during the three-plus hours of the Superbowl.
He says it has to be self-improving literature that reminds me to be good. Any recommendations?
Also, would you please keep notes on all the commercials during the Superbowl plus who performed at the half-time show and send me an e-mail after the game.
If I don’t keep up with my gym friends’ conversation Monday, they’ll want to know why and I’ll have to fess up that I was sitting in the naughty chair. Some of the women are non-submissive and they like to make fun of me and call me “Lil’ Miss Spanked Bottom” when they hear that I got in trouble.
Yes, I know a great book, the short-story collection “Daddy Issues,” by my good friend Claire Colinsgrove. Reading these hot tales of naughty young women receiving red tails will keep you entertained as well as reinforce your wifely duty to obey your husband at all times.
Two of the stories in “Daddy Issues” include age-play spanking role-play while the other story is strictly M/F spanking romance.
“Daddy Issues” is available in Kindle format on Amazon. To purchase your copy for the reasonable price of $2.99 simply click on this link http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00B6BK41M
And, no, I’m sorry but I won’t be able to send you an e-mail detailing the Superbowl commercials and who sang what at the half-time show.
My husband considers the adoption of the face mask to be a disgrace to the game of football and does not allow the so-called sport on TV in our home. We instead will attend the Sunday night professional wrestling matches at our town’s auditorium watching real men play a real sport.