Sloppy Cleaning Earns Wife a Sound Spanking and a Week of Nude Housekeeping

Dear 1950s Wife:

My husband performs a "white-glove inspection" of our house when he returns from work each evening.

Normally I keep the home spic-and-span. But I'm so engrossed with my favorite soap opera’s latest plot twist that I sat down to watch this afternoon with the sound turned on. (I usually rely on our TV's "closed captioning" feature so I can vacuum the den while watching my program.)

I'm afraid the 30 minutes I sacrificed to television viewing forced me to hurry through my chores. Everything was ship-shape in our 4,000-square-foot three-story home except that my husband found a tiny speck of dust on the window sill in the attic.

Naturally, he turned me over his knee, bared my behind, and spanked my bottom cherry red. As a proper submissive wife, I accept my husband's right to spank me soundly for such an offense. But he says I have additional punishment in store.

I'm not allowed to watch my soap opera for a week. And for the next seven days, I must do my cooking and cleaning in the nude.

It's bad enough to be denied my program. But it will be really embarrassing if the milkman sees me through the screen door when he makes his deliveries each morning.

Don't you think my husband is taking my punishment too far?

Good woman:

Goodness, gracious me, certainly not! You should thank your lucky stars that your husband showed mercy on you and didn't make your punishment worse.

Your wifely duty is to properly clean the house so your husband, upon his arrival home from his busy day at the office, can partake of his evening relaxation in elegant surroundings. How can Hubby enjoy his cocktail, dinner and TV time watching the boxing matches if you've left the house in a shambles??!!

A speck of dust on the window sill of the attic: What a disgrace!

If I ever left our house in such a state, my husband would spank my bottom hard so hard that I couldn't sit down the rest of the night. And, during my week of nude-housekeeping, I'd wear six fresh cane stripes administered each morning.

Moreover being restricted from watching your soap opera for a week is hardly undue punishment. I'm forbidden to watch any TV during the day while my husband is at work. (Though I can't help but sneak peeks at "I Love Lucy" re-runs now and again. Shush, don't tell.)

So I certainly don't consider your punishment excessive.

One caveat: your husband should call the dairy and inform the milkman of your punishment. Hubby should request the milkman, when making his deliveries, be careful not look through the screen door and inadvertently catch a glimpse of you naked as you clean house.

I've never, ever heard of a milkman taking undue liberties with a housewife while husband is away at work. So you may rest assured that your milkman won't be sneaking a peek at you in your birthday suit.