Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Husband Makes Me Call Him "Daddy"

Dear 1950s Wife:

My girlfriends tease me because they think it's strange that my husband makes me call him "Daddy" at home and in public.

Good woman:

1950s Wife firmly believes 1) teasing is good for you because it enhances wifely submission; and 2) your girlfriends are the ones who're strange.

1950s Wife proudly notes that she has never once in ten years of marriage broken my husband's command that I refer to him as "Daddy" at all times and in all places. And, despite my perfect record, I support Daddy's wise decision to regularly spank, paddle and cane my bare backside to reinforce this rule and others that promote proper behavior on my part. Whenever acquaintances arch their eyebrow's at my use of the term, I simply tell them "I call my husband 'Daddy' because he loves me, cares about my behavior and, whenever I am naughty, turns me over his knee, lifts my skirt, takes down my panties and spanks my bare bottom cherry red!"

I strongly suggest you offer the same explanation to your friends!

Wife Trained in "Spanking Songs"

Dear 1950s Wife:

My husband, George, makes me sing this song before he spanks me:

"Georgie Porgie Puddin' n' Pie
Spanks Me Hard And Makes Me Cry
Spanks Me 'til I Holler 'Oh!!!'
And That's Why I Love Georgie So!!"

Except when it's my birthday. Then I must sing to him:

"Happy Birthday to Me
Happy Birthday to Me
Today is My Birthday
So It's Over Your Knee"

Good woman:

Good for him!

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Burned Dinner, Bottom "Lit on Fire"

Dear 1950s Wife:

Was it fair for Hubby to spank me with a breadboard paddle for burning dinner in the oven and feeding him microwaved hot dogs instead?

Good woman:

Yes.

Marriage Proposal From a "Younger Man"

Dear 1950s Wife:

I've been dating this wonderful fellow for a year now and he recently "popped the question." I love him dearly, but, sadly, he is only eight years older than me. My parents say he is far too young to be "marriage material." It will break my heart to call off the engagement. Whatever am I to do?

Good woman:

1950s Wife is generally of the opinion that a fiance should be at least 15 years older than his betrothed to ensure sufficient maturity necessary to guide his helpmate. However, in very rare occasions, a suitable match with a "younger man" is possible provided the father of the bride-to-be makes suitable investigation.

Invite this fellow over for dinner so your father can have a long talk with the young man in his study prior to supper. If the conversation assures Daddy of your suitor's intelligence and judgment, the young man must clear another hurdle: After you serve your parents and boyfriend dinner and stand silently by the table with your hands on your head while they finish their meals, your fellow should take you over his knee, lift your skirt, lower your panties and give you the spanking of your life.

Daddy should keep a sharp eye as to vigor of arm and strength of disposition. Your boyfriend must ignore your screams and not let you up until your bottom is bright red and you're bawling your eyes out. Then he must make you kneel before him, kiss his hand and say "thank you, Sir, for spanking me so hard, I know you do it because you love me and care how I behave." After that he may give you a reassuring hug and pat on the bottom and send you off to eat your supper (no desert) with your plate on your lap as you sit in the corner. (Paddle swats from Daddy if you spill your food.)

Provided he passes this exam, your boyfriend may graduate to fiance with the blessings of 1950s Wife.

Lost Job at Candy Factory and Spanked by Hubby :(

Dear 1950s Wife:

I lost my job at the candy factory after just one day because I couldn't keep up on the assembly line. I tried really hard to put the candy in the boxes but they rolled by so fast that I couldn't keep pace. I got so far behind that I ended up stuffing a bunch of candies in my mouth, but the forewoman caught me and fired me on the spot!

When I got home, my husband put me over his knee and spanked me until I cried for losing my job, then made me stand in the corner for an hour. After that, he spanked me again really hard for going off my diet by eating candy. And he says I have to look for a new job tomorrow! I try to tell him that "a woman's place is in the home," but he won't listen. Is he being unfair?

Good woman:

Unfair by tanning your bottom twice in one night? Of course not! If you mean unfair by making you look for work, 1950s Wife is generally of the opinion that "a woman's place is in the home." However, just as "Rosie the Riveter" did her duty during World War 2, in these troubled economic times an exception may be made to the rule.

As you're clearly unfit for assembly line work, 1950s Wife suggests an alternative: humbly apologize to the forewoman and ask if you can at least be paid minimum wage for being made a daily example of the risk of assembly line idleness. Your husband can drop you off at the factory on his way to work. Before letting you out of the car, he should put you across his lap and spank your bottom scarlet red. Then you can spend the next eight hours standing in the corner in front of the assembly line with your skirt tucked up and your bright red bottom on display. This will aid the factory's productivity by reminding female workers of what awaits them at home by slacking off and losing their jobs, as well as improving your moral disposition by reinforcing your womanly duty to be submissive at work and home.