Wednesday, August 7, 2013

"Miss ENFP" Meet "Mr. ISTJ," the Perfect Psychologically-Matched D/s Couple

Dear 1950s Wife:

Have you heard of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator test? My gal pals, submissive and non-, say it’s essential that a couple contemplating marriage take it to ensure they’re appropriately matched.

Boy oh boy, I sure hope they’re right because I recently kicked my fiance to the curb based on his shocking result on the exam.

You can find the quiz online and we took it together the other night. I went first and wasn’t at all my surprised to learn that I’m an “ENFP” with strong psychological preferences for extroversion vs. introversion, intuition vs. sensation, feeling vs. thinking and perceiving vs. judging.

As a vivacious “girly girl,” naturally I love chatting and texting with my gal pals on my smart phone and flirting with handsome men at social gatherings.

If it wasn’t for the fact that Daddy checks my cell phone usage, even though I’m 26 years old and pay the bill myself, and spanks me soundly for exceeding my allotted minutes, I’d probably be on the phone 16 hours a day.

And since we became a couple, my ex-fiance kept my innate desire to be “belle of the ball” in check by turning me over his knee when I engaged in excessive conversation with other men at dinner parties.

As a woman, naturally I use my intuition and feelings to make decisions, knowing that I can always rely on Daddy or a boyfriend to correct me if I stray. As my Mama says, “God made men stronger thinkers compared to women for a reason, the same reason He blessed women with soft bottoms and men with firm hands.”

As far as perceiving vs. judging is concerned, as a selfless individual, I refrain from judging others except when it comes to bad haircuts or fashion faux pas. And I advocate looking beyond the plain meaning of a rule to achieve a just result tempered by mercy, especially when I’m trying to talk Daddy or a boyfriend out of spanking me.

Prior to taking the test, my friends told me that it didn’t matter that much if my fiance was shown to be an extrovert or an introvert.

But, as I’m a submissive woman looking to make a lifetime commitment to a dominant man, it’s essential that he show strong preferences for the manly characteristics of sensation, thinking and judging vs. the feminine psychological qualities of intuition, feeling and perceiving.

My fiance's scores were acceptably strong in sensation and judging. (And, FWIW, he showed a slight preference for extroversion.)

But imagine my horror when the test showed him having only a moderate preference for thinking over feeling!

With a lifetime of marital satisfaction at stake, I certainly couldn’t risk getting hitched to a “softy.” With such affinity for “feeling,” he might embarrass me by tearing up at sad scenes in movies or similar unmanly emotional displays.

And if he’s that in touch with his feminine side, for all I know I might surprise him coming home early from a “girls night out” to find him staring at the bathroom mirror dressed in a set of my pink panties, bra and camisole.

I must say that he certainly didn’t “take it like a man” when I took off my engagement ring and told him to hit the road. The way he carried on as I ushered him out the door bawling and blubbering that I had broken his heart. What a crybaby!

My parents were a bit upset when I broke the news, particularly as the wedding was only two days away and they’d already paid for the arrangements. But once I explained to them the importance of the test in predicting psychological compatibility, they understood.

To recover money spent paying for the wedding, Daddy fired the maid and I must work it off spending my weekends for the next six months cleaning my parents’ house. And Daddy says I’m getting spanked at the end of each weekend as punishment for not taking the psychological test before I accepted my ex-fiance's proposal.

If I knew six month’s worth of spankings were in store, I’m not sure I would have made the same decision. What do you think?

Good woman:

First let me say that your comment about possibly catching your fiance wearing your underwear as one of reasons for breaking your engagement is completely unfounded.

Cross-dressing is a perfectly acceptable hobby for the dominant man, as it’s attitude that counts, not choice of underclothes. If adorning himself in pink frillies in the privacy of his home gives a man pleasure, it’s the duty of the wife to support her husband in his choice.

That being said, of course you made the right decision in calling off the wedding. I’d not heard of this test before, but if men of science declare the proper match for an “ENFP submissive woman” is an “E or I + strong preference STJ dominant man,” then it’s folly to do otherwise.

(For you gals who don’t understand the part of the previous sentence that reads like an algebraic equation, get your husbands or boyfriends to translate.)

Besides, my quick internet research on the topic shows that the legendary psychologist Carl Jung had a hand in designing the test and everyone knows he was into spanking.

And for more info about this sort of personality test, here’s the Wikipedia link:

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